Bette Midler and Woody Allen together.

It's an idea good enough to start you laughing while the titles are still running.

And, for a while, it works. The trouble is that the scriptwriters have no idea what to do with the terrible two once they get them inside a massive shopping mall.

It was certainly not a great notion, either, to cast them as long-term husband and wife who, after they've told each other about their recent affairs, just make up and bicker, make up and bicker, through the rest of the film.

There are occasional good moments (but not many) in the last hour of a film that mercifully is at least short.

What a waste of these two tiny titans of talent to have them go even semi-serious on us under circumstances like these.