The first glimpse we get of the damned queen is her wreathed in swirling dry ice - not so much the Gates of Hell as the door of opportunity in Stars In Their Eyes.

"Tonight Matthew, I'm going to be a blood-sucking, power-crazed Egyptian princess," were the words you could almost hear the late Aaliyah say.

However, one plane crash later and the movie is number one at the American box office.

Stuart Townsend has turned Anne Rice's Vampire Chronicles into a far fizzier affair than Neil Jordan's chilling Interview With The Vampire.

Tom Cruise's Lestat - a seductive 18th century nobleman with fangs - is now a camped-up ham with all the menace of a slightly miffed Dale Winton.

He's done the dirty on his vampiric chums by blowing their cover and they're not happy, least of all Akasha, Mother of All Vampire (Aaliyah), who sees him as a threat to her plans for world domination.

Her first port of call is a dodgy club in London's East End (aren't they all) where she makes a bit of a meal of the bloodsucking party people.

Among the undead victims-in-waiting is a caped fop who pleads with her to have a heart - so she does.

Then it's onto Death Valley, where Lestat - who has re-invented himself as a rock star (Ozzy Osbourne, perhaps?) - is planning to confront his erstwhile brothers-in-blood at a mega gig.

Meanwhile, paranormal expert Jesse (Margerite Moreau - whose last bid for cinematic glory was Connie in the Mighty Ducks trilogy) is also harbouring more than a professional interest in him.

Of course, it could be an enormous send-up in the vein (sorry!) of Carry On Screaming, but the nagging worry is that director Michael Rymer really thinks this is a genuine journey into the dark side.

Tim Evans