The beauty of hitmen is that they get away with murder. Unburdened by conscience, they can say and do whatever they like - perfect characters for the rest of us to vicariously vent our frustrations through.

Okay, so Hitman was (ironically) a total misfire. But most of cinema’s recent contracts have been bang on target, from the slippery Lucky Number Slevin and ear-splitting actioners Shoot ‘Em Up, Crank and Smokin’ Aces to Javier Bardem’s Oscar-killing act in No Country For Old Men.

Having nabbed an Oscar himself (for Six Shooter, 2006’s Best Live Action Short) writer-director Martin McDonagh sticks to black comedy for his debut feature, mixing the pathos and un-PC laughs of similarly-toned capers The Matador and You Kill Me.

Six Shooter’s Gleeson is Ken, a veteran assassin packed off to Bruges with his protégé Ray (Farrell) after the latter hits more than his intended mark during his last job.

Awaiting the call from deranged gang boss Harry (Fiennes, channelling Ben Kingsley in Sexy Beast), Ken is keen to explore ‘the Venice of the North’ while Ray would rather just drink, sulk and swear.

But a movie set offers double excitement in the diminutive form of American actor Jimmy (Jordan Prentice) - “They’re filming midgets!” – and alluring Euro-lovely Chloë (Poésy, aka Fleur Delacour of Harry Potter 4).

Neither is as they seem. Jimmy turns out to be a hooker-happy, drugged-up racist and Chloë makes a habit of handing out her phone number to strangers. But they’re the least of Ray’s problems.

See, Harry’s just given Ken his latest assignment, which Ken’s not too happy about. Which means that ’Arry ain’t ’appy either. And what with Ray being generally unhappy, it seems that this is a fairytale town with no happy endings.

Except, that is, for the audience. As the wonderfully unreconstructed protagonists, Fiennes and Dubliners Farrell and Gleeson are in four-letter clover.

Homophobic, Yankophobic and fattyphobic, they are also surprisingly moralistic. Ray is drowning in guilt, Ken knows that there is no real justification for what he does, and even Harry lives by his own ethical code.

In Bruges is a morality tale with a distinctly Coen-ish air, making excellent, occasionally surreal, use of a great location and lacing the comedy with bloody unpleasantness. It even has a quirky score by Coen collaborator Carter Burwell.

A shot in the arm for contract killer groupies… and one in the eye for the PC brigade.

Elliott Noble