Who does an impoverished artist turn to when her $39,000 student loan stands little chance of being paid off with her pay as department store lackey?

Well, it seems Steve Martin is the man to find. As silver-haired divorcee Ray Porter he secretly signs the cheque while wooing Clair Danes' bored shop assistant Mirabelle.

A computer tycoon with charm, manners, poise, elegance and an acute executive jet habit, he appears a loaded Mr Right for Mirabelle's dreamy singleton.

At the other end of the social scale, she works the rarely-frequented glove counter at Saks Fifth Avenue in Beverly Hills and by night scrawls away as a frustrated artist.

Pretty soon they've ignored the age gap (she's in her 20s and he's 50-odd) and are an item, sharing candlelit dinners and Ray's bed overlooking the twinkling lights of LA.

It all looks lovey-dovey and tickety boo...until the C-word raises it's ugly head. It seems Ray can't commit.

Director Anand Tucker - using a screenplay crafted by Martin from his own novella - attempts to explore the confusion and mis-communication of "love in the real world".

However, the self-consciousness kookiness of some of the dialogue, an overwrought score and Martin's mis-casting drag things down.

Danes is a highlight as the romantic transformed Pygmalion-like (she has 96 costume changes during the film) by Ray's gentlemanly attentions.

However, Ray as played by Martin comes across as a bit of creep rather than the life-affirming divorcee who essentially sees Mirabelle as a plaything to be discarded.

Jason Schwartzman delivers a likeable turn as the slacker soundman who offers Mirabelle his heart rather than his wallet and provides the comedy highlight with a night of debauchery with a Saks vamp who mistakes him for Ray.

But it never really all fits together as a satisfactory whole and - for a comedy purporting to reflect real life - ends with no broken hearts...just bruised ones.

Not one for the top of the shopping list.

Tim Evans