American tourist Leonardo DiCaprio, halfway through the holiday from Hell in downtown Bangkok, inherits a map from crazed Robert Carlyle and finds an island paradise somewhere off the Thai coast. For some reason best known to himself and the plot, Leo makes a copy of the chart and gives it to two passing acquaintances. Taking a pair of French backpackers for company, he swims a mile from one island to another, jumps off a sky-high rock into a lagoon and thence to a happy hippie commune ruled over by Queen Tilda Swinton. She takes a shine to the newcomer, who has unfortunately fallen for the French girl backpacker (Virginie Ledoyen). Given the copy of the map, the flames of jealousy, the rifle-wielding marijuana farmers on the island and the sharks patrolling its shores, all this takes rather a long time to end in tears. Leophiles will love him with his shirt off, but, despite its fusion of familiar audience-pleasing elements, there's too little of moment going on for this film to grip our attention until it's more than half-way through.